We never learn, do we?

We never learn, do we? We will do same things over and over again. We will let same thing to hurt us. 

I wanted to be smarter. I wanted to just be me. Single. But… Life (or maybe love) happened. I fell for his smile immediately. Almost same smile I fell for years ago. Also name is same.

Only thing that is different is me. I changed. I learned. I am not falling in love as I did years ago, because I already know consequences. One broken heart and I am sure that heart won’t be his but mine.

Have I learned properly?

How time goes…

Today I was standing in front of the mirror looking at myself. I took really long way and learned hard way. 6 years ago, I made wrong decision and I hurt my self for the very first time. Since then I did more times. 1 year ago, my mum died and I was living in some kind of bubble where I was feeling nothing, but pain came back. Just now.

And here I am, 2 000 kilometers away from my home, all alone, standing in front of mirror and feeling pain. What do I do?